I Can Top That One, Boortz

Neal Boortz opines,

Just a small wager: I’ll collect from you on this on the morning of November 3rd. I’m betting that an impartial observer of the November 2nd election will be able to tell you who won our presidential election merely by watching the video — no audio — only the video of any of several Arabic television stations or news channels. Just watch the people in the streets of Tehran, Cairo or Damascus. If they’re shouting, celebrating and shooting their AK-47s into the air, you’ll know that Kerry won. If there are long faces in the capitols of the sponsors of terrorism, you can get ready for another four years of George W. Bush.

Heck, Neal, there’s no need to go and find any Arabic stations. Just watch the networks. The look on Katie Couric’s face when the 2000 election was called for Bush was worth the entire recount chaos that shortly followed.

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25 Responses to “I Can Top That One, Boortz”

  1. DaveJ Says:

    The arab version has a certain comical flair to it.

    But who ever wins, I’m going to get trashed.

  2. Drinkplenty Says:

    I agree with getting trashed.

    I’m throwing a keg party with red and blue dixie cups for Bush/Kerry supporters, respectively.

    For every state called for your side, the opposition has to chug some beer.

    It’s gonna be a fun night.

  3. Vilmos Soti Says:

    > Just watch the people in the
    > streets of Tehran, Cairo or
    > Damascus.

    I would remove Tehran from this list. Remember, after 9/11, the people of Iran went out to the street with candles to show their solidarity and respect to the American people.

    > If they’re shouting,
    > celebrating and shooting their
    > AK-47s into the air, you’ll know
    > that Kerry won. If there are long
    > faces in the capitols of the
    > sponsors of terrorism, you can
    > get ready for another four years
    > of George W. Bush.

    So in either case, we will end up with long face. Either in the streets of the Middle East, of in the White House. Sheeh. Life just doesn’t seem good.

    Vilmos

  4. jeff Says:

    The election is going to be very close. I know, because the media told me. Since they’re the same ones who said the California recall would be a squeaker, Howard Dean was a shoo-in, and Troy would be this summer’s blockbuster, I have to believe them.

  5. Mike M Says:

    If we’re lucky, Bush’s re-election will be followed by video of burning Iranian government buildings and mullahs fleeing into the desert.

    Imagining the reaction of Dan Rather and Tom Brokaw when the last red state pushes Bush over the top is almost enough motivation to get TiVo on its own…

  6. Drew Says:

    I’m hoping that the Bush camp comes home to Austin for the Election Night festivities. I look forward to actually making it down this time, as I was laid up with a sinus infection in 2000.

  7. Jim Treacher Says:

    You were watching Couric’s FACE? She must have been wearing pants that day.

  8. Bob Says:

    Kerry reputedly has close ties to the mullahs in Teheran. If Kerry falls, the mullahs may not be far behind.

  9. FunctionalAmbivalent Says:

    Because There’s No Better Measure of What’s Good For America Than the Wisdom of the Arab Street

    Neil Boortz touts the wisdom of the Arab Street in chosing an American President: I’m betting that an impartial observer of the November 2nd election will be able to tell you who won our presidential election merely by watching the

  10. Vidkun Quisling Says:

    Sometimes the blow-dried crew can control their expressions in the face of distressing Republican victories; sometimes they can’t. The last time I can remember watching broadcast coverage of elections was 1994, when Peter Jennings had an on-camera meltdown over the Republicans winning the House. He was raging about the American public being a bunch of babies having a tantrum. Bernie Goldberg covers this incident in his book, but it doesn’t do full justice to the live performance.

  11. b-psycho Says:

    “You were watching Couric’s FACE? She must have been wearing pants that day.”

    LOL, pretty much.

  12. azlibertarian Says:

    Who’s Katie Couric?

  13. tim Says:

    any link to video of Couric on election night?

  14. erp Says:

    Don’t have to go through all the trouble. If it’s on the front page of your morning paper, Kerry won. If it isn’t, Bush won.

  15. Crank Says:

    And if Tim Russert’s still drawing on his whiteboard when Couric comes on, it’s gonna be a long November.

  16. OkieBert Says:

    Hey since 1980 I have been checking out the winner early on just by looking at Dan Rathers face…. you can tell by his expression. The better the Republicans do, the more sour his face is.

  17. jack white Says:

    If Bush is re-elected, the spin will be how this is bad news for the GOP.

  18. Patrick Says:

    “[Jennings] was raging about the American public being a bunch of babies having a tantrum. Bernie Goldberg covers this incident in his book, but it doesn’t do full justice to the live performance.”

    Indeed! … but nothing tops Rather’s language looniness on election night, stuff like: “If a frog had sidepockets, he’d carry a firearm” … if he is semi-crazy, kerry won; if he is totally crazed, like Kennedy giving a 1am speech at closing time – Bush won.

    FREEDOM’S TRUTH: Liberating Iraq

  19. Baseball Crank Says:

    POLITICS: 8/3/04 Links

    *Kerry wants to send nuclear feul to Iran. Seriously. I wish I was kidding. Next thing you know, he’ll be kissing Brezhnev . . . *Neal Boortz: I’m betting that an impartial observer of the November 2nd election will be…

  20. maha Says:

    Are we living on the same planet? It’s obvious Muslim terrorists want Bush to win. He’s their best recruiter.

  21. Bostonian Says:

    Maha, either way the election goes in November, the Islamicists will make it clear which their preference was.

    Will you come back then to admit to your complete lack of understanding of human nature?

  22. mrbigs Says:

    in their eyes radical islamists never had so much reason to take up in arms. they want bush to win, because right now he is their reason for existence.

  23. Xavier Says:

    “in their eyes radical islamists never had so much reason to take up in arms. they want bush to win, because right now he is their reason for existence.”

    The same is true of Dean supporters in the United States. Do you think they’ll be cheering if Bush wins because they’ll have a convenient figure to focus their anger on for another four years? I doubt it. Republicans get a lot of mileage out of their anti-Hillary rhetoric, but I don’t think they would be sorry to see her go.

    You may be correct that having a single hated individual in power is good for his opposition because it motivates them, but that’s not the emotional response.

  24. Gramps Says:

    mrbigs:

    Yeah, you’re so right. Terrorists never would have considered attacking America if the Evil Bushhitler hadn’t invaded Iraq. It’s all Bush’s fault.

  25. American Mother Says:

    On Election night 2000, Tom Brokaw looked straight at the camera and told everyone waiting in line in to vote in the Panhandle of Florida they could go home without bothering to vote, because the rest of the state had just voted for Gore…Absolutely no pretense of real newscasting there! I’ve never listened to or read another word that man has had to say since.

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