Pay Attention, Lileks…

… and these things won’t happen to you in the future (where no one can hear you gripe):

Examples: “Alien Vs. Predator,” which I saw last weekend. I knew it was bad. The DVD box might as well have said “Buckets O’ Shite!” – Roger Ebert on the front in 72 pt type, and I still would have rented it, because, well, Alien! Vs.! Predator! Even though I didn’t much like the Predator movies, and hated the fourth Alien like a retinal cyst, I had to see it. Got about one-third through it before overcome with boredom and disinterest, and the nagging sense that the director did not take the source material seriously.


James, James, James. You should have remembered my review of that dumb flick from last fall. Then you’d know you were supposed to skip the first third of the movie and go straight to the silly (but oddly entertaining) mayhem. Let this be a lesson unto you.

Only moderadely-more-serious Lileks story: Two Christmases ago, I was visiting my folks and reading that day’s Bleat on my iBook. My then-two-year-old nephew clambered up into my lap and pointed at a picture of a drooling Homer Simpson halfway through the column (it’s also in today’s Bleat, linked above). “Who that?” he asked.

“That’s Homer,” I said, followed up by my best faux-Dan Castellanetta “AAAAAGH” drooling noise.

Ever since then, when that kid sees my iBook, it’s “Show me Homer! Show me Homer! AAAAAAAGH!”

True (if completely trivial) story.


One Response to “Pay Attention, Lileks…”

  1. Swanky Conservative Says:

    The only good film with both Aliens and Predator

    is Batman Dead End. Not Aliens vs. Predator, as Will Collier tries to tell James Lileks today. An additional plus, it has Batman and the Joker in it and it is better than the last three Ba…

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